Dearest Karen,
Please know I write this with love, admiration and bemusement, and some
ambivalence on my part about whether or not I agree with you!!)
You don't have any kids, do you?
Susan (a militant public breastfeeder who was aware of the etiquette issues
and felt a little awkward but did it anyway)
----- Original Message -----
From: "Karen Mercedes" <dalila@R...>
To: "Edward Norton" <belcantist2003@y...>
Cc: <vocalist-temporary@yahoogroups.com>
Sent: Monday, January 13, 2003 8:10 AM
Subject: [vocalist] OFF: Public breast-feeding (was: Did Somebody Mention
Counter-Tenors???!!!)
> Sorry, folks. I don't care how "natural" or "beneficial" breast-feeding
> is, in modern American society it is STILL bad manners for a woman to
> expose her breast in public places (the exception being the erotic
> entertainment venues - which are in and of themselves etiquette
> minefields). Far too many private functions are now seen as perfectly okay
> to perform in public view, much to the dismay of those of us who wax
> nostalgic over the comforting discreetness of the etiquette of past
> generations (borne out of what has become an almost extinct sense of
> consideration for the sensibilities of others). Whipping out
> one's tit and shoving it into a baby's mouth simply is not an activity
> that most strangers - and even friends of the mother - really care to be
> exposed to in public places. The mother really should stop thinking solely
> of her own convenience, and instead think more of the offense she might
> cause by her action. The whole premise of a system of etiquette is NOT to
> challenge the rights of other people to be offended by certain unmannerly
> acts, but instead to provide a code of minimal acceptable conduct that is
> designed so that no-one really has to ponder whether a given action will
> possibly offend others. Militant public breast-feeding is unmannerly pure
> and simple. And attempting to turn it into a campaign of sorts seems like
> a very thinly veiled attempt by the offending mother to divert attention
> from her own laziness in not simply standing up and moving to a place that
> is PRIVATE before feeding her baby. If this means having to interrupt a
> dinner-table conversation for 15 minutes, so be it. Part of parenthood, as
> any parent will tell you, is relearning how to manage time, prepare for
> contingencies, and charmingly apologise for the interruptions that one's
> children inevitably cause to one's social life and own convenience.
>
> Karen Mercedes
> http://www.radix.net/~dalila/index.html
> ________________________________
> One must be something if one
> wishes to put on appearances.
> - Ludwig von Beethoven
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