| We are having a church wedding.
Then your church Music Director will be the one who plans your music with
you. Churches vary wildly as to what is and what is not "allowed". We also
hopefully explain the reasoning behind what is and isn't allowed in a way
that shows empathy and understanding for the couple's desire to choose the
music that *they* love.
Speaking from my area, the Roman Cathlolic wedding rite is modelled after
Sunday Mass. The participation of the community is favored over solo
singing. Although I am a professional singer, I do not encourage a lot of
vocal solos at weddings, especially as guests are being seated. I want them
to greet one another, not sit back and listen to me sing. Instead the
organist or an instrumentalist plays.
Liturgical music I typically encourage include hymns such as "Joyful, Joyful
We Adore Thee", "Lord of All Hopefulness", "Love Divine All Loves
Excelling", "God Is Love", "Taste and See" and others. We include a sung
Psalm, just like on Sunday, and it's sung by a cantor from the ambo, just
like on Sunday, and the assembly is encouraged and invited to sing, just
like on Sunday. I use Ps. 128 (Blest are those who love you, happy those
who follow you) and any others emphasizing joy and felicity like Ps. 50
("This is the day the Lord has made").
Some solo songs I do at extra-special moments: One Hand, One Heart (which
emphasizes God's gift of eternal life through Christ e.g. "even death can't
part us now"); any setting of the Song of Ruth, especially the M.D. Callahan
("where you go, I shall go"); the ever-pop. Ave Maria (Schubert.. the Gounod
is too dramatic and draws attention to itself and the voice), Mozart's
"Laudate Dominum", Franck "Panis Angelicus", Schumann "Du Ring on meinem
Finger", or other classical works. I sing the Peter Paul and Mary song if
the couple just MUST have it (but I hate it) and really de-emphasize other
pop songs, suggesting that they work better for cocktail hour at the
reception than for their ceremony.
As to a bride singing at her own wedding. Well, don't hate me, but I would
discourage it in the most strenuous possible way. Speaking only from my own
area of expertise, which is the Catholic liturgy, there isn't a place for
the bride to get up and sing without bringing the ceremony to a grinding
halt. Plus, your wedding is not the time to worry about singing well, voice
support, mic technique, and all the other stuff that you have to do as a
singer. Imagine trying to light your Unity Candle while balancing a
microphone in your hand. Yuck. And until your wedding day, you can't begin
to know how it will feel. It will be 100 times more emotional than you
think it will. BTDT!
So, just as I advise Uncle Jim to sing "When Irish Eyes are Smiling" at the
wake, not the funeral, I'd advise a young couple to sing to each other at
the reception, not in the church.
My 2c.
Carol Spradling
Director of Music, St. Augustine's, Diocese of Syracuse
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