<< << I've started looking at dresses, but so far it seems everything I find
is
(a) sleeveless and (b) high-waisted. I think sleeveless is inappropriate for
church; besides, I have a womanly figure (not fat, just voluptuous) and look
*terrible* in these types of gowns. Have any of you ladies faced this
problem? Any ideas on where I can turn for something different (I live in
Houston, TX)? >> >>
Ooh, this is one of my favorite rants!
In my experience, if you are a woman over 40 any larger than a size 8 (or
maybe a 10) you are going to have problems finding clothing for almost any
situation--but recital attire is particularly difficult.
I searched for 2 years before I found my best dress--and it didn't come
cheaply! I found it in a bridal shop--a beautiful blue dress with a lovely
beaded top with a chiffon skirt.
I tried having a dress made, and it was an utter failure--the "tailor" as she
called herself--was great as a seamstress but had no clue as how to FIT
someone whose body doesn't conform to the "fashionista's" notion of beauty.
(If you have breasts and hips, God help you!) She ended up ruining $250 worth
of gorgeous Italian silk fabric, and I was in tears.
Like you, I am not obese (although I could stand to lose some weight), just
full figured. I have large breasts and a definite waistline--two things that
designers today apparently consider to be mutually exclusive. It's almost
impossible to find something large enough to fit on top that doesn't make me
feel like I'm wearing a parachute. And besides, I've never enjoyed the
feeling of being swathed in tons of fabric. It makes me uncomfortable and
self-conscious. I prefer more "constructed" clothing.
And I've also found that sizes are almost completely unpredictable. My closet
contains everything from 12s to 16s--and they all fit. Go figure. But often,
Misses sizes are too small, while women's and plus sizes are far too large.
Anyway, here are some of the things that I have learned along the way:
1. Plan far in advance. If your recital is 6 months away, you should be
looking for your dress NOW.
2. Find a really good bridal shop, tell them what you need the dress for, and
look through their samples to show them what you do and don't like. Then they
can do some research for you, and order a dress in time to have fittings
done, etc.
For example, I've found that many of the "mother of the bride" dresses are in
very pale colors (because the mother doesn't want to upstage her daughter).
But I wanted a more vivid shade (my coloring is very fair) because I wanted
to have a more definite "presence" on the stage. I knew that I wanted to show
off my waistline, and that I wanted a bit of decolletage--nothing too deep,
but no high necklines--and I wanted long sleeves. (The dress I finally found
has sheer, beaded sleeves). I also wanted something that could span the
seasons--no velvets, etc. I also wanted a skirt that had some movement to
it--and that would not be constricting when I walked onstage or took a bow.
3. Contact the costume department of local opera companies. If they use
professional costumers, these are most likely people who are accustomed to
dressing SINGERS--people who need to BREATHE, who don't slouch, don't
necessarily need gigantic shoulder pads, etc.
4. Separates can be a good way to go. There are lots of beaded tops out
there, and I see lots of really beautiful skirts. (BTW, I am considering
having the "ruined" dress transformed into a skirt, then making a
coordinating top.)
5. Try shopping online. I found one really interesting site for "full figured
women"--don't laugh! It's by Delta Burke (from Designing Women) and the
evening wear selection is really quite interesting--and affordable too. I
haven't actually purchased anything, but I told a friend who has since bought
an outfit that she is just thrilled with.
Here's the address: http://store.yahoo.com/realsize/index.html
Click on "Shop for Evening Wear."
6. If you find something that works, BUY IT! Don't assume that it will be
there when you come back. If you do a lot of concerts, I think it's a good
idea to keep a little "slush fund" (or at least, available plastic) for
spur-of-the-moment purchases.
It also helps to keep in mind that department stores, etc. are WAY ahead of
the season, so if you are shopping for a winter dress in December, your
selection will be severely limited--you should have done your shopping in
August or September!
ARRRGH!
Judy
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