When I'm talking about children, I mean young children who wouldn't
understand why to men or women might by holding hands or kissing. A 4-year
old who knows Mommy & Daddy kiss, hug, hold hands, is seeing this as it
relates to being a family. When a child this young sees 2 men or women doing
the same things it leads to questions they aren't able to understand the
answers to. That's all I mean. My 12 knows what "being gay" is about. My
intention is not to keep this information from my kids. I just don't see
what benefit their is to having a 4-5-6 year old knowing what being gay is
about.
-----Original Message-----
From: Karen Mercedes [mailto:dalila@R...]
Sent: Monday, June 11, 2001 9:08 AM
To: vocalist-temporary@yahoogroups.com
Subject: RE: [vocalist] 2Be out?
It's interesting how different people view this. Another poster said she'd
rather that gays don't indulge in demonstrations of affection in front of
her children. I personally have never thought that shielding children from
reality is the best way to teach them to deal with life. Also, by asking
gay friends to refrain from displaying affection in front of children, one
is not only creating an unrealistic fantasy world for the children - a
world in which gays don't exist or, at least, don't show affection for
each other; one is also asking one's gay friends to deny who they are, and
to act hypocritically. Hardly a good lesson to teach your kids when they
do, inevitably, find out the truth. Not only will it lower their esteem
for the gay friends who were complicit in your little "make believe"
fantasy (if they agreed to do so - which frankly would lower my esteem for
them), it will lower your children's esteem for you, because they will
recognize that you, in essence, lied to them. That is if they haven't
already developed into what you - wittingly or unwittingly - hoped they
would become all along, which is homophobic.
I think that sexual behaviour in front of children is wrong regardless of
the sexual orientation of the parties involved, so of course I would
expect ALL of my friends to refrain from fondling, deep kissing, and other
forms of sexual activity in front of my children. But to make a rule for
gay people that they can't hold hands in front of your children while
making no similar rule for straight people: well, as I said, your agenda -
no matter how politely you attempt to justify it - is quite blatant, and
frankly repugnant.
I just wish people would be less Pharasiacally obsessive in their worries
that exposure to people they consider "unclean" will some how corrupt
THEM, and try much harder, instead, to truly live what Hillel and Jesus
taught.
Karen Mercedes
............................
NEIL SHICOFF, TENORE SUPREMO
http://www.radix.net/~dalila/shicoff/shicoff.html
My Own Website
http://www.radix.net/~dalila/index.html
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
+ I sing hymns with my spirit, +
+ but I also sing hymns with my mind. +
+ - 1 Corinthians 14:15 +
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