Music Lovers,
I thought this might keep you smiling as you go into the weekend.
Have a good one. Ginny Allen
CHILDREN'S ANSWERS IN MUSIC EDUCATION.
These are stories and test questions accumulated by music teachers in the
state of Missouri, circa 1989. Source: Missouri School Music Newsletter.
* It is important to be able to reach the brakes on any piano.
* Just about any animal skin
can be stretched over a frame to make a pleasant sound
once the animal is removed.
* It is easy to teach anyone to play the maracas.
Just grip the neck and shake him in rhythm.
* My favorite instrument is the bassoon.
It is so hard to play people hardly ever play it.
That is why I like the bassoon best.
* The plural form of musical instrument
is known as orchestra.
* Tubas are a bit too much.
* A contra-bassoon is like a bassoon, only the opposite.
* The most dangerous part about playing cymbals
is near the nose.
* The flute is a skinny-shape-high-sounded instrument.
* Instrumentalist is a many-purposed word used by many player-types.
* Anyone who can read all the instrument notes
at the same time
gets to be the conductor.
* The main trouble with a French horn is
it's too tangled up.
* For some reason, they always put a treble clef
in front of every line of flute music. You just watch.
* The concertmaster of an orchestra is always the person
who sits in the first chair of the first violins.
This means that when a person is elected concertmaster,
he has to hurry up and learn how to play a violin real good.
* Question: Is the saxophone a brass or a woodwind instrument?
Answer: Yes.
* Last month I found out how a clarinet works by taking it apart.
I both found out and got in trouble.
* A bassoon looks like nothing I have ever heard.
* Cymbals are round, metal CLANGS!
* Question: What are kettle drums called?
* Answer: Kettle drums.
* When electric currents go through them,
guitars start making sounds. So would anybody.
* The double bass is also called
the bass viol, string bass, and bass fiddle.
It has so many names because it is so huge.
* While trombones have tubes,
trumpets prefer to wear valves.
* A trumpet is an instrument
when it is not an elephant sound.
* Another name for kettle drums is timpani.
Or else you can just stick with the first name and learn it good.
* Instruments come in many sizes, shapes and orchestras.
* A tuba is much larger than its name.
* My favorite composer is Opus.
* My very best liked piece of music is the Bronze Lullaby.
* Probably the most marvelous fugue
was the one between the Hatfields and the McCoys.
* Most authorities agree that music of antiquity
was written long ago.
* A good orchestra is always ready to play
if the conductor steps on the odium.
* Caruso was at first an Italian.
Then someone heard his voice
and said he would go a long way.
So that's why he came to America.
* Music sung by two people at the same time
is called a duel.
* When a singer sings, he stirs up the air
and makes it hit any passing eardrums.
But if he is good,
he knows how to keep it from hurting.
* In the last scene of Pagliacci, Canio stabs Nedda
who is the one he really loves.
Pretty soon Silvio also gets stabbed,
and they all live happily ever after.
* An opera is a song of bigly size.
* Aaron Copland is one of your most famous contemporary composers.
It is unusual to be contemporary.
Most composers do not live until they are dead.
* Handel was half German, half Italian, and half English.
He was rather large.
* John Sebastian Bach died from 1750 to the present.
* A virtuoso is a musician with real high morals.
* Refrain means don't do it.
A refrain in music is the part
you better not try to sing.
* Agnus Dei was a woman composer
famous for her church music.
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Thanks to Annette for FWD from Andy:
"http://www.egroups.com/list/andychaps_the-funnies/"
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